misc-joy

Explorations by Kenley Neufeld

What am I Listening to? 2019-12-11

By on December 11, 2019

Shine on You Crazy Diamond (Parts 1-5) [Live at Knebworth 1990] [2019 Mix] Pink Floyd The Later Years: 1987-2019

I Still Miss Someone (Take 5) Bob Dylan & Johnny Cash The Bootleg Series, Vol. 15: Travelin’ Thru, 1967-1969

Love You To Bits (Bit 4) No-Man Love You To Bits

Beograd SebastiAn Thirst

Dark Night of the Soul Van Morrison Three Chords and the Truth

No Surprises McAlmont & Webb The Last Bohemians

Learning to Lose (feat. Willie Nelson) Margo Price All American Made

Hentai Cigarettes After Sex Cry

Buddhism in Everyday Life

By on December 3, 2019

This is part two of a talk I gave at the Vista Buddhist Temple on November 9, 2019. You can listen to part one here. In the second part, I explore what mindfulness means, how to practice mindfulness, how to maintain mindfulness, and the Five Mindfulness Trainings.

Thanksgiving

By on November 28, 2019

Thanks for rain and snow, a lovely and supportive partner, beautiful and kind children, food to eat, good health, books, good friends, a solid job, meditation and an ethical mindfulness practice, compassion and empathy, freedom, quiet, sobriety, Thich Nhat Hanh, the Buddha, a safe home, awareness of suffering, shoes, music, good doctors, trees, shared transportation. The list can go on.

What are you thankful for today?

Touching Ancestors: Guided Meditation

By on November 27, 2019

“For over 4 billion years the earth has been here, holding and feeding single-celled organisms, dinosaurs, plants and flowers, and humans. We acknowledge and embrace the many generations of Vietnamese who carried Buddhism to us through our Teacher, Thay, and helped build the sangha in new lands.”

Thus begins a guided meditation offered at the Vista Buddhist Temple on Saturday, November 9, 2019. This is part one of a dharma talk I offered with the theme Buddhism in Everyday Life.

Sangha Can Be the Next Buddha

By on November 26, 2019

Earlier this year I was invited to contribute to the November issue of Lions Roar magazine as part of their Buddhism’s Next 40 Years: A Time of Reformation series. In this article, I offer three ways we can rethink community and fulfill Thich Nhat Hanh’s aspiration for the Buddhist community.

Buddha, dharma, and sangha are three precious jewels in Buddhism. According to Thich Nhat Hanh, “The most important of these is sangha.”

Illustration by Sydney Smith.

For many years, the Zen master has taught that “it is probable that the next buddha will not take the form of an individual. The next buddha may take the form of a community, a community practicing understanding and loving-kindness, a community practicing mindful living.”

Continue reading at Lions Roar.

Screaming Mind and the Love Meditation

By on November 4, 2019

The words begin “May I Be…”, and they have been a practice for the past six months. When we reach those places in our meditation practice when nothing seems to work, we can turn toward those actions that are more simple. More basic. This is a place I’ve found myself this year. Sitting meditation went to the wayside. Chanting went to the wayside. Same with Touching the Earth. Asking for help was about all that could be mustered in these moments of difficulty. 

When speaking with my mentors and teachers, each one shared how important it can be to turn toward the body. Body awareness is tactile, real, and evident in virtually everything I do. When I walk, I can walk with awareness. This is a deep meditation. My body is often in motion and so these moments can be an opportunity  to know there is a body present. Legs are there to provide locomotion. Feet are there to touch the earth in each moment. 

And yet, even this most basic practice of being aware of the body and its locomotion can be a challenge in these deserts of practice. When my frustration or distraction arises, as it often does, then if I can bring mindfulness to the moment. This moment is an opportunity to be free. Seeing and touching the movement without judgment. And not to push away the mind with force, but to offer an acknowledgement. Drawing attention to my mind as it screams at me about all my suffering and then learning to calm it with bringing my attention to my body. 

It might only last a minute or five minutes, but that is enough in my relearning to tune the mind and the body. These moments of nuance are guiding me in the practice of mindfulness. A long journey unfolds on this path toward ease and happiness. 

The other practice suggested by my mentors is the Love Meditation. It has been a daily reading practice with my focus on myself throughout this year. The words appear on the page as I read and though I don’t believe they will help, I read them anyway. Slowly and with intention. 

May I be peaceful, happy, and light in body and spirit. 
May I be safe and free from injury. 
May I be free from anger, fear, and anxiety.

The first stanza ends with anxiety, a place I know all too well, and it’s easy to get caught by the word as I read it into my mind. As I feel the anxiety present, I turn back to the the word happy earlier in the verse. There is anxiety and there is also happiness. It is possible. 

May I learn to look at myself with the eyes of understanding and love. 
May I be able to recognize and touch the seeds of joy and happiness in myself.
May I learn to identify and see the sources of anger, craving, and delusion in myself.

This verse has been really difficult. My criticism and unhappiness for myself has been strong. There is understanding, so the verse says, but I can’t see it. I’ve felt love for myself, but it has been missing. Can it be cultivated by into my consciousness? Sometimes it feels impossible. And yet I read it into my mind each day, hoping and trusting that it may arise again. 

May I know how to nourish the seeds of joy in myself every day. 
May I be able to live fresh, solid, and free.
May I be free from attachment and aversion, but not be indifferent.

Here we have advanced practice! For me, I have to embody and hold the first two verses as true and experienced before I can move into this lasting experience. Knowing how to nourish the seeds of joy can be identified. For example, stopping to smile at the ocean before arriving at work. This can be done each workday. But how can it be sustained at other moments in the day? That is the challenge and the practice. 

Pacific Ocean with Fog Bank. Leadbetter Beach, Santa Barbara, CA
Leadbetter Beach, Santa Barbara, CA

During this year while practicing with the Love Meditation, I’ve had to let myself trust that it will work. For many days, I didn’t have faith that reciting these verses would actually help me. But I read them anyway. Allowing the dharma rain to penetrate into me even if I’m always wearing a raincoat. In some form, the words can seep in through the sleeves or around the neck. And if I let them touch me every day, then at some point I’ll be saturated. 

It’s been a good practice. A foundational practice. One that I know is working. Moving me from despair and criticism to gentleness and love. 

The journey continues.